I admit to an incurable love of chick flicks. I know that it is so awfully female of me but I have always loved those sappy, female-oriented stories. Steel Magnolias, Beaches, You’ve Got Mail, Pretty Woman – you name it, I’ve seen it, loved it, probably own it on DVD and can recite the lines to you. I just can’t help getting all gooshy about the love stories and the sisterhoods, the female bonding and bitching, the romantic swoons and the happy endings.
Lately, though, I have found myself unable to watch them very easily. In the final days of my marriage, love stories on television or in the movies would piss me off so bad that I would have to turn it off. Sex scenes, romance, and wedding scenes specifically made me want to throw the remote through the screen. I was so angry at that point that I just couldn’t stomach the idea of romance, love, commitment, faithfulness or happy endings.
Now, though, it’s a little bit of a different story. Nowadays, I have trouble watching them because I am so darn lonely. I want so badly to be loved by someone, anyone, that I get edgy if a love scene of any degree comes on. Those intense looks between the couple, the heartbreakingly handsome leading man and the relatably familiar leading lady, that just make your heart go pitter-pat. Those breathtaking moments as they lean in for that long-awaited kiss. The longing as they reach out to one another.
I miss kissing. I miss that intimate connection to another human being. I miss that sense of melting from 2 separate individuals into 1 soul. I miss that breathless anticipation, that bump-bump of the heart, as you lean into each other. I miss the feeling of being in someone’s arms, someone that loves you and accepts you for who you are. The hungry nibbles, the tender touching of lips, that sweet sharing of breath. Good heavens, do I miss kissing!
So, for now, when those moments come on tv, I’ll turn the channel. I’ll try not to pick any movies to see that might include one of those soul-shaking kissing scenes. It will help my mental health tremendously, I think, to forego the romance for a while. But if anyone out there finds a decent man for me to kiss, can you please send him my way?
manonmona reblogged this on Espacio de MANON.
Love this one!